The Question I Keep Getting: What’s Your Endgame in Mexico?

Dating in Mexico

A question was asked on Twitter":

“Bro what’s your long term plan? Are you just endlessly going to go on dates with random latinas—who are all dating multiple other people? You’ve been posting about this stuff for years. I back your dedication to the game but will you ever retire?”
This could be a hostile question. It’s the sound of someone who thinks Mexico is a time capsule and thinks most people get married quick, or a subtle jab.

So let’s talk about, this topic doesn’t usually get much attention.
* I encourage everyone to check out the twitter thread also I know that the comment section here is nowhere as vibrant as twitter

How Mexico City Has Changed in 2025

What You Actually Get In Mexico City

I live in the capital, not a ranch town and not a hammock beach. Mexico City is a place where the economy is stronger than outsiders assume, where private universities churn out ambitious twenty somethings, where creative scenes and tech scenes blur, and where a woman with talent can build status without attaching herself to a man at nineteen. When people have options, they behave like they have options. It’s not the 1950s, but it’s also not the West’s clown show. It’s a country and capital in transition.

Choosing a global city also means choosing its faults: compressed time, long commutes, late dinners, and larger social circles. The environment is doing precisely what it was built to do, offer variety, and upward mobility. Capitals often rewards a different skill sets, and if you arrive with small-town expectations, you might get cooked.

Guide To Mexico City

My Life

I’ll try to keep it simple without turning this into a guide. I have regulars and I have girlfriends. Some I’ve seen for months, one or two for over a year. A few are fun and functional but clearly not candidates for a family. Others are serious contenders, curious, low-drama, values aligned and keep the chaos low and the day productive. That’s what happens when you build status, health, and a lifestyle that screens aggressively. A man with options exercises those options, and apologizing for being selective is a sermon for people who ran out of options a decade ago in my opinion.

Long term, I want a family. I don’t see it in the middle of La Condesa at peak swipe hour; I see it outside the city, maybe the Jalisco highlands, maybe the Ajusco belt, places where you have a more relaxed lifestyle. The decision isn’t about courage or “being ready”; it still comes down to incentives. Youre dating life is going to be extremely boring for the average guy that’s used to having options in a city.

The Expat Bachelor’s Guide To Latin America

Frankly

The internet pays a premium for chaos, and chaos sells. A low income party girl who treats your living room like an after hours club will always outperform, in clicks, the well-adjusted woman who sends memes about chairs and reminds you about your dentist appointment. Stability doesn’t trend on social media. So lots of post bend toward the wild stories of the week like the the unhinged gringa, the DJs, the fresas and buchonas. So from the outside, post and tweets reads as endless churn.

A history lesson to the story

Mexico raced toward bringing people from povery and rural life to middle class faster than it cleared the bottlenecks that actually make middle class life work. They modeled after a lot of western countries, but recognize the faults in time to mitigate them. Incomes improved and education climbed, but the bureaucracy remains trash and the infrastructure still has a lot of things missing. You can feel it when a routine errand takes a half day or when crosstown movement eats your afternoon. This is the life of a lot of people in the capital, essentially struggling to make ends meet and manage modern/almost western life, but without any of the safety nets or backbone of western society. Layer on the cultural shift: a generation of mothers telling daughters, “Don’t depend on men; make your own money; don’t end up pregnant at seventeen like I did,” meeting a generation of men raised on older machismo scripts. Nobody is the villain, it’s just that incentives are misaligned to having families in Mexico as they used to be.

A typical day in this city for the average citizen, begins before sunrise, squeezes into a packed commute, grinds nine or ten hours, steals another hour or two to get home, and spends the weekend trying to feel alive before Monday restarts the loop. It’s a mix of anti-family values and people running on empty wallets and empty batteries. If you run a countries people at that pace, adding a newborn without structure is a fantasy unless the terrain is adjusted to make it sane. Like many Americans, a lot of people fear they don’t have the resources to start a family or they havent gotten to a point in life where they can fathom it.

Answering the Tweet

When someone asks whether I’ll “retire” from dating, they’re either picturing a Mexico that doesn’t exist anymore, or a bad faith question trying to demean the player lift. In a high option environment, patience is an option. Date well, protect your peace, build your base, and don’t confuse motion for progress. When the terrain changes, place, partner, routine the choice changes. Cities reward optionality; families reward commitment. I’m not allergic to the second. I’m refusing to settle at the moment.

There are parts of my life I don’t put on the timeline because privacy is how serious things survive a city that monetizes spectacle. The way it really works is quieter than people think…

Some relationships are built on convenience: chemistry, logistics, and clear boundaries that make sense for both people. Sometimes its just honest enjoyment without trying to hammer misaligned fundamentals into a future they’ll never fit.

Others are what I’d call contenders, women with low-variance temperaments who bring reciprocity instead of score keeping. Frankly, the fault of the influence on western society, is that there are a lot of women that want the man to provide, but selfishly provide nothing in return.

“Traditional” women here aren’t traditional in cadence; they’re modern women with roots in tradition. If your aim is a truly traditional incentive structure where family formation is the default, you step outside the hype loop into micro-markets where time expands and the social graph shrinks.

Why Are Latinas So Toxic And Crazy ?

The Next Few Years

Over the next few years, I expect the city to keep bifurcating. A minority will pair bond early and well because their habits favor it, their circles reinforce it, and their schedules don’t cannibalize their best hours. Everyone else will optimize lifestyle over legacy until incentives flip. At the same time…Mexico’s fertility will keep drifting downward in the urban core and it might get harder and harder.

But…For men who keep their health, income, and competence intact, the option set will remain asymmetric, but the caveat is non negotiable. Peace has to be protected.

Until then, I’m refusing to larp. The city is what it is, and I’m playing the map as drawn.

If you were in a high-option city like CDMX, what would actually make you trade novelty for family, place, partner, or routine?